Six bits of synchronicity

This heart-warming little synchro-tale comes from Mike Clelland, whose hidden experience blog  usually focuses on UFOs and aliens. But the only possible alien connection in this tale are the ones from south of the border. Interestingly, the evening before Mike’s story arrived, I mentioned in passing that we hadn’t heard from Mike Clelland  in a while, and Trish responded: “Watch, now we will.” Right she was.

 (If you’re not familiar with the term ‘six bits’ in the title, it means 75 cents.)

***

I teach winter camping for an outdoor school in the Northern Rockies. After a two-week course, it’s nice to get the stink out of the down sleeping bag. This is no casual undertaking. A negative 40 degree winter bag is huge, and it only fits in the biggest washing machine at the Laundromat, and it takes forever to dry.

I was at the local Laundromat on the main street in my little town. Stuck there with that down bag in the dryer. I would open the door, feel the dampness and add another quarter.

It was a quiet day, and I was sharing the Laundromat with a family of Mexican immigrants. The young couple had a few kids running around, they didn’t seem to speak any English, so all I could do is periodically smile at them.

The set up of these big industrial dryers is a little bit awkwardly, one is on top of the other, and there are two sets of buttons that control the two units unit. I was using the bottom, and the Mexican family had the dryer on top. I added a quarter, and I realized it was the WRONG slot. I had just mistakenly given the family an extra seven minutes of time.

No biggie. But, I somehow manged to do this two more times. I just “gave” the Mexican family 75 cents. Why was I so confused about using a dryer?

I wasn’t interested in asking the family for my money, that seemed silly. At the same time, I went through all kinds of weird liberal guilt about what I had done. I played it out in my head, had I just altruistically helped these poor people? Wasn’t it a nice, that I – the privileged white American – could be so selfless. I immediately recognized how pathetic and useless that avenue of thinking was, and I just dismissed the whole thing.

Not too long later, the sleeping bag was dry, and I left.

From the Laundromat, I went directly to the local Grocery store. I got what I needed and stood in line at the check out with my few items.

As I inched forward in the line, I noticed the checkout girl. The strange thing was, in my head, I immediately announced to myself, “She’s an angel!”

I was awestruck.

She was young and extremely pretty. She had dark hair and dark eyes, and I assumed she was Mexican. As she helped the customers ahead of me in line, she was quiet and smiling. There was something so radiant and pleasant about her, and the silent way she went about her job, that it left me genuinely touched.

I get up to the cash register, she rings up the few things on the conveyor belt, and I pull out my wallet to pay.

But, I didn’t have enough cash. She shows me the total, and I realize I am exactly 75 cents short. I was embarrassed and said I would return an item to the shelf. She didn’t speak, she casually pantomimed to me not to worry. Then she reached under the counter separating us, and she pulled up her purse. She dug through it, pulled out a little change purse, and calmly counted out three quarters and put them in the cash register. She smiled, I thanked her, and walked away.

I have never seen her before or since.

As I review this event from a few years later, the thing that impresses me is the life lesson, that I needed in my life, right then.

I had been through a lot of difficult emotional stuff in the previous years, a lot of isolation and depression. It’s sad to admit but something as normal as people being nice to me would induce anxiety, I felt like I wasn’t “worthy” to receive kindness. Even simple things would be challenging. I wouldn’t let friends buy me lunch, or if someone complimented some job I had done, I would awkwardly find a way to deny their praise.

But, on this day in the grocery store, the very lovely cashier did something nice, and the weird synchronicity seemed to disarm me to the point where I smiled (truly smiled!) said an honest thank you – and moved on.

Since that day, I feel like I’ve been really good at saying thank you. And that was a really important hurdle in my life.

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15 Responses to Six bits of synchronicity

  1. Trish and Rob MacGregor says:

    I think you pegged it, Ray.

  2. Ray says:

    There truly is more than one lesson here. When giving a kindness we don't even realize until after the fact there is an angel guiding our hand and maybe the same one is the one returning the favor.

    Ray

  3. Trish and Rob MacGregor says:

    Sounds like your publicity stuff is going great, Gibbs! Keep it up! It's wonderful to see how it all unfolds.

  4. gibbsonline says:

    P.S. Congratulations on the publication of your book.

  5. gibbsonline says:

    I also have an hour interview with Allen Steinfeld on his New Realities blog.This Friday I give a talk re my book at the Association For Spirituality and Psychotherapy at the Open Center in New York. There will also be 2 Jungain discussants (The Marinos). I hope they don't pull out a copy of Jung's Red Book and fling it at me.

  6. Trish and Rob MacGregor says:

    Gibbs, two bits of analysis! I'm sure Mike will appreciate. 😉

    BTW, you should recognize his name. Click Mike Clelland's Blog on the right side of the page, the first thing you will see is your photo accompanied by a two-hour video lecture on synchronicity. You've got a big fan.

    I didn't know you had worked with Whitley Streiber. Very interesting.
    R

  7. gibbsonline says:

    M C – Your name sounds very familiar. Maybe we met in a past life. Your touching synchronicity embedded in yor revealing psychological contexts validates my naturalsitic theory of synchronicities. Synchronicities are markers that a seemingly unresovable psychological problem as been solved.You had been struggling with the issue of not feeling worthy in being given to. Your own act of 75 cent kindness was your own unconscious pushing the boundaries of your here to fore conflict about giving. This act of yours was a signal that you had found a creative solution to your conflict of giving and taking. I believe had you not pre consciously solved your issue – the kind act of the "angel" would have been noted but proably not with the 'numinosity' you clearly must have experienced. This, of course, we will never know directly. In my view = you were as much of an angel to yourself paralleling the kindness of the pretty girl.

  8. therese says:

    Love this story. It's a pay it forward thing.

  9. Natalie says:

    Lovely post. 🙂

  10. Trish and Rob MacGregor says:

    I wonder if we've all got "angels" like these! Small acts of kindness, with big ripple effects, just like you said, Nancy.

  11. GYPSYWOMAN says:

    yes, a truly beautiful story – and it reminds me a bit of the roadside angels i experienced a few years ago on a very exhausting road trip and that i commented about in a previous post here – and all of which, as the other readers have already said, just goes to show, the nature of kindness has no barriers –

  12. Nancy says:

    Great lesson here. It's the small kindnesses we show that have ripple effects. Great reminder to stay conscious to what is really important as we go about our daily lives.

  13. Vicki D. says:

    I really liked this story and it just reminds us that it is truly the little things that make a difference.
    Thanks for sharing.

  14. Anonymous says:

    Oh, Mike, what a beautiful story, and with such a message! All our lives we are told, "what goes round, comes round", but more often than not, it isn't as overt as this. In an earlier brief comment I repeated the old adage that goodness begets goodness, most of the time. Your story underscores both these old truths in such a profound yet simple way. Thank you for sharing it with us! cc

  15. 67 Not Out (Mike Perry) says:

    As you say, a heart warming story – with so much to read into it.

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