Powder cat, figuring how to get off the couch
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Animals live in a universe of synchronicity. They are so fully present in the moment that they seem to swim in the flow of time, regardless of where they are or what they’re doing. With dogs, you watch them playing and you see it. You watch them sniffing, hunting, racing across a lawn, a dog park, barking and jumping at squirrels, or just lying in full contentment after a full day and that now presence is obvious. And within that presence, they sometimes sense the future.
On Sunday, February 11, after returning from Orlando, it was obvious that our cat, Powder, at least 18, perhaps as old as 19, was dying. She’d been ailing for 4 or 5 years with thyroid problems, was nearly blind, and didn’t do much of anything except sleep and eat. I considered taking her to the vet to be put to sleep, but felt this would traumatize her. So I brought her outside with me and we sat in the sun, beneath a cloudless blue sky, with Powder in my lap for a long time. I talked to her, loved on her, asked her to return to us.
At one point, she squirmed to be let down, so I set her on the ground by the patio table and went inside for some water. When I came back out, she was gone. I couldn’t imagine how she’d moved anywhere so quickly, but figured she’d headed for the nearby bushes and shrubs. I found her deep in the greenery. She’d crawled into a deep hole the dogs had dug under the house, lying in the cool dirt, breathing hard.
That was when I knew for sure she was ready to move on – and that the dogs had known this before me and maybe before Powder herself had known. I picked her up and carried her back onto the porch and set her on a cushion where the dogs sometimes sleep. And then I broke down, sobbing, and Nika, Noah, and Nigel came over, licking me, licking Powder, saying good-bye to her.
In all the years we’d had her, she was the most tolerant animal in our household. Bring in a dog, a bird, another cat, a hamster, fish, a guinea pig, that was fine with Powder. She welcomed them into the fold. In 2007, the night before we had to put down our Golden Retriever Jessie, Powder knew. She curled up next to Jessie and spent the entire night with her. When our black and white tuxedo cat, Whiskers, and later, our orange tabby Simba joined the clan, Powder welcomed them. When we got Noah, then Nika, then Nigel, Powder was the welcoming committee.
After she died, I wrapped her up and buried her in the hole under the house that the dogs had already dug for her. Rob had to cover it with bricks so the dogs or other animals can’t dig into it, and I’m on a hunt for the right potted flower for that spot.
This happened 4 days before the solar eclipse on Feb 15, an event often preceded by or coinciding with external events that force us to release something so that new opportunities can be ushered into our lives.
The day before the solar eclipse, the Parkland mass murder of 17 people happened, and perhaps, finally, this horror will result in tighter gun control laws. The day after the eclipse, today, Mueller indicted 13 Russians for interfering in the 2016 election and those indictments pretty much put an end to trump’s endless tweets about how this Russia stuff is all a witch hunt.
The personal, the global.
RIP, Powder. We hope you’ll be around soon!
Before going to sleep last night I sat in my chairbed and thought about all my animals. Don’t know why. And I wept as I recalled the unspeakable joy each had brought to me and the intense grief when they departed, especially when I had to hold them in that moment. I needed my eyes to be the final human they saw. I weep for Powder, for you and your wonderful family of fur-baby and feathered children. They are precious beyond expression. When I brought Storm home, (AKC black Lab), she was four months old. I took her head between my hands and she looked directly into my eyes, not attempting to move. I told her, “You can’t leave before me. You must stay here when I’m gone. I can’t be here without you. Do you understand?” I said it very softly. She quivered. Her entire body quivered for several seconds, then she gently licked the top of my hand and laid her chin in my lap. I cried then. She is my canine angel, and I meant what I told her. She must stay. She is the closest thing to a Service Dog without having had training, and she senses my every need, never being more than a foot or so from me except when Dad takes her outside. I can’t, and won’t, imagine life without her. I love the photo of your non-human family. Thank you so much for sharing!
Maybe Powder will come back to you physically after she has rested for a bit. You’ll know it’s here, for sure, if she chooses to do that.
I think Storm understood every word, CJ!
It is so hard to say goodbye to these companions, but all of us who have loved them must learn to do so. I know they live in the now and sense what is happening with those of us who love them. RIP, Powder. You lived with quite a crew and I also pray you will be back soon. 🙂
She was the sweetest.
Powder kitty was so pretty. XXOXOX I’ll miss her.
Me, too, Melissa.
Sigh…it is so hard to say goodbye.
She will be back. She was tired and wants to rest a bit but is around and you’ll feel her stronger very soon,
All of my pets visit from time to time, sometimes around the house or in a dream. They never really leave us.
No matter what it is still so hard. Sending you loving hugs and a hug and kiss to your other pets.
Thank you, Vicki! I’m sure she’ll be back…
Weeping for you and with you, still missing and loving the animals I have had and lost who knew everything.
Thanks, Adele. They do seem to know everything!