Kindness and a Hug

Matisse

On April 29, we put up a post called God’s Eye. As the comments came in, it seemed that most of us had maybe heard this story elsewhere and weren’t convinced it was true. But we all seemed to agree that if it was true, it was powerful.

What I found fascinating about the comments was that several of them contained stories about kindness extended to strangers who were distraught, at the brink, suffering. All too often in today’s world, where so many of us feel constantly pressed for time, kindness takes a back seat. In these stories, synchros – all of them  – a hug, a kind word, exactly the right phrase uttered at the right time – made a significant difference in another person’s life.

We’ve posted the experiences from Sansego and Vicki in this post. In their synchronicities, they are or someone they were with at the time extended that kindness.  The synchronicity from Debra Page at mythic musing will be in a separate post; in her story, someone extended that kindness toward her.

From Sansego:

When a friend and I did a roadtrip to NYC and Boston in 2002, we were in Staten Island and my friend had to use the restroom in a McDonalds. I stayed in the car. He took a long time and there were sketchy people walking around outside. I started getting worried. When he finally came out, he apologized and explained that he had met a guy in the restaurant who looked distraught and talked about wanting to kill himself. My friend engaged him in conversation and bought him a meal. He thought the guy had the intention to shoot up the McDonalds, but the guy’s demeanor changed after talking with him. My friend has an amazing personality and connects with anyone he talks to, so I don’t doubt that he had the ability to affect another person in a positive way.

I guess what we can learn from this is that we can do something when we see someone who looks lonely or sad. Being brave and striking up a conversation just might be the thing they need. For me, its hard to do because I’m so introverted and afraid of being rudely rejected. I envy my friend’s easy ability to connect with everyone…and he always initiates conversations with other people and puts people at ease.

 From Vicki D, responding in part to Sansego’s comment:

I too am shy. But  several years ago at parent night at our HS a woman I don’t know that well seemed very agitated. Several of us were talking and she kept interrupting. I was getting annoyed but then I felt something different and I felt she needed a hug.I said “I think you need a hug.”

I’m not a big hugger unless I know you well so my close friend really looked shocked when I then hugged this woman. At first it was a bit awkward but then she melted into me and began to cry. I have never forgotten that moment.

She came up to me a week later at another meeting and said “I have to thank you. I really needed that hug, it took me by surprise.” It seems several things had just happened to her that had eroded her trust in others and so when I did that it made her realize that not everyone is negative. It also changed me and has made me more open to people and to look more closely at what may be going on with them.

Is the story in your post real? I don’t know, but I think it points out how each one of us can make a difference (my personal motto).
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So perhaps if each of us strives to take the time to be kind or to extend help to a stranger in need, we can becomes agents of change, one person at a time.

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10 Responses to Kindness and a Hug

  1. Nancy says:

    This is a much needed reminder to live consciously. Thank you.

  2. Natalie says:

    Such a lovely post. Just what I needed right now.Thankyou Blogger angels. ♥

  3. GYPSYWOMAN says:

    yes, absolutely, roadside angels, trish –

    and i certainly remember the dale evans book – beautiful

    and always the quote – angels unaware – it is true

  4. Trish and Rob MacGregor says:

    Lakeviewer – great story. A different sort of angel!

    Mike – I know what you mean about neighborhoods. We've lived here for 10 years and with a few exceptions, we don't know our neighbors that well.

  5. Anonymous says:

    Does anyone remember the little book by the late Dale Evans entitled "Angel Unaware"? She was the lifetime wife of Roy Rogers, and the book was the story of their baby who was born with heart disease, hopeless in that day and time. Oh, what a beautiful, uplifting story that was! Their little one was surely an angel who brought so much joy to them and to everyone in her brief life. We should all be mindful that as surely as we live and breathe, we are in contact every day with angels unaware….usually strangers whose kindnesses come along when most needed. Such blessings, these angels unaware!
    A reminder that the Master Teacher admonished us to "entertain strangers, for we may be entertaining angels unaware"! Today we often fear strangers, not knowing their motives, but there are so many out there with such pure hearts and hidden wings, that we needn't and shouldn't be afraid.Goodness begets goodness almost always, in one form or another!

  6. lakeviewer says:

    These are the moments we remember forever, these acts of generosity and charity that made a big difference in our lives.

    I'll tell an incident in my life that has stayed with me for decades:

    Right after I had my last baby, I found out that I needed ten more teaching days to obtain my permanent status. It was the end of the school year. If I didn't teach those days I would lose credit for the entire year.
    I didn't want to leave my infant with a sitter yet, and I was not happy about missing out on my permanent status.

    When I presented my dilemma to my supervisor, she agreed to have me bring my baby to school. She moved me across the hall from the teachers' lounge where we set up a nursery. My mother was with the baby while I taught, and every two hours, my supervisor released me to nurse the baby.

    That act of accomodation was a life-saver for me and my baby.

  7. Vicki D. says:

    I was so surprised to see my post as one of your main posts.
    I still remember that day.

    Gypsywoman I think those were angels, there are so many stories like that. No matter what, they were certainly angels in disguise.

    So many people when they have a crisis or negative thing happen to them will say "my life changed after that" or "I look at life differently now", It is nice when something good happens that we can also say those things. I know that it is true for me.

    Have a beautiful day.

    Oh, I see ESPERANZA is getting close to publishing, can't wait.

  8. Trish and Rob MacGregor says:

    Great story, Gypsy! Roadside angels.

  9. 67 Not Out (Mike Perry) says:

    The power of a hug! Kindness also never goes unrewarded.

    I feel that today (at least in the UK) the old fashioned neighbourhoods have changed. People often don't know their neighbours and many are crying out for someone to talk to and to listen to their problems. We so need to give kindness, a smile, a word of encouragement and to follow our instincts when we see someone who needs help.

    As the Man said: Love thy neighbour – or something to this effect.

  10. GYPSYWOMAN says:

    so true – and on point to each of us each and every day – so true! just reading the first sentence or so reminded me of a time several years ago when i was making another cross-country road trip from the east coast to louisiana – i was exhausted – it was hot – and i was driving my little lebaron with the top down – in any event, i just remember being so totally exhausted from the trip which had been an emergency one due to the critical illness of my sister – i had spent weeks 24 hrs a day in hospital waiting rooms and now trying to make the trip back without stopping overnight because i had to be at work – i was in a the mountains in virginia – was almost out of gas and thought one of my tires was low – and there was a longer than usual distance between exits – in any event, i came to this little historical town and exited to the only service station – and again, let me just say i was more than exhausted and without sleep and still had miles and miles to go – so i pull in and am literally wondering how in the world i'm going to get out of my car and do what i had to do – there are no other cars at all at this station – no customers – i pull into the lot and am looking around for air pumps on the empty lot and don't see air pumps! – so i decide to get gas first – pull up to the pump and at that moment, a white pickup truck pulls in at the exact set of pumps but on the other side – and two young guys get out – and they both look over at me [i haven't yet had time to even get out of my car] and they both speak to me – and you know, there was just something about them – to this day, i can still feel it – this something about them – anyway, i smiled and said hello back and open my door and as i do that, one of these boys comes over to my car and says, "here, mam let me get this for you – how much do you want?" as he offered to pump my gas – i smiled and said, "oh, no, really, you don't have to" to which he responded, "oh, yes, let me do this and do you need your tires checked?" – now, the other young man is putting gas in their truck and checking under the hood – and while his friend is putting gas in my car, he comes over and tells me to open the hood so he can check things for me – which he does – when the gas is done, the other one told me to pull over to the air pumps so he can check my tires and i told him that there weren't any air pumps – i had circled the station and could not find any – and he said, "oh, yes, mam, they're right over there" – and pointed over to air pumps opposite the pumps where i'm sitting – and yes, i HAD looked there – so i pull over and he checks my tires and one is very low – when he finishes, he puts his elbows on the passenger side of the car, leans forward, looks me straight in the face and says, "now, you're ok – have a blessed day" – his friend comes to my side and says, "yes, mam, you have a blessed day" – and they both walk back to their white pick-up truck and drive away [eastbound just like me] – leaving me literally sitting there speechless and overcome with their kindness – it takes a few seconds for me to gather my thoughts from this intense few minutes of pure goodness before i can drive away – and then i realize that i've not thanked them properly and decide to try to catch up to them on the road and at least wave good-bye or something – i didn't know what, really – i just felt so remiss in my own manners – i get on the road and speed up a bit thinking i'll catch up with them – but they were not to be found on the road – now, the next exit was probably 15-20 miles away – and i never came across them – to this day, i remember the kindness of those two strangers at a time when i needed it so – a beautiful thing! i wonder of them still –

    oh, listen to this wv=coure – which in french means "fly"!

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