Before Megan was born, Rob and I led tours for travel writers to the Amazon. The boat in the picture is from the movie Fitzcarraldo, and is the sister boat to the one on which we traveled from Leticia, Colombia to Iquitos, Peru.
In those days, Leticia was a border town, a John Wayne sort of place where everyone was up to no good. Iquitos was a city completely surrounded by and isolated in Amazonian jungle. The distance between these two cities was about 350 miles and believe me, in the Amazon, that’s a very long way.
The trip took about three days, if memory serves, and on one trip, we stopped at a village to trade trinkets for fruit, art, and whatever. I traded lipstick and some other items for a beautiful owl that the boat’s owner promised to set free in his animal sanctuary upriver. This owl was huge – don’t recall the particular type of owl, but he was big. He perched on a railing on the boat, his wings cut so that he couldn’t fly, and watched us, the gringo writers.
I spent a lot of time with this owl, taking to him, hoping to touch him, to engage him, trying to get him to eat stuff from my meals. But he refused because the food – cooked fish – was dead. So one of the guides told me to feed him live piranha that we caught in the river. I did and he loved it. I worried about this owl, talked about him, and finally one of the writers, this guy from NY, rolled his eyes and said, “Trish, you’re such a mush head.”
“What the hell does that mean?” I shot back.
“It’s just an owl,” he replied. “It’s not a conscious being. It doesn’t give a shit about you. You’re anthropomorphizing.”
“So a mush head is a person who anthropomorphizes?”
“Yeah. You got it. Animals don’t have feelings.”
Needless to say, this guy and I didn’t get along at all.
When we arrived at the jungle camp, the owner of the boat, Paul, an expat from LA, kept his word. He released the owl in his preserve and during our two nights in the camp, I heard the soft, haunted hoots of a happy owl.
Now and then over the years, I’ve thought about this guy from NY, about his term for me. Mush head.
When Megan and I rescued a wounded duck from the lake behind the house where we used to live, I heard him calling me a mush head. Whenever I fed a stray cat, when I got sick as Sea World during the awful whale act, when Rob stopped in the middle of the road to move a slow turtle to the curb so it wouldn’t get run over, I thought of this guy. Mush head is a term that means you are soft in the head, a bit cuckoo, whacked out, not entirely with it. And in NY guy’s universe, the term applied to individuals who believe that animals have feelings.
My memory of this guy was triggered this evening by a story I read about a lion and a lioness in Brazil. The lion, Dengo, 11, was separated from his partner, Elza, 10, after sharing a cage for eight years. He apparently sank into a depression so dark that he just laid around and refused to eat.
The zoo in which Dengo and Elza were kept, ZooNit, was a non-profit organization supported by the government, but lost its license for non-compliance on the basics- you know, space, cleanliness, food. Dengo was allegedly living in a dark, cramped cage.
When ZooNit was closed, Dengo was sedated for his trip on an Air Force plane. According to the articles I read, he will now share an open space with Elza and other lions and Bengal tigers. I imagine Dengo is eating again, roaming, and doing whatever lions do when they are happy.
Chew on that one, guy from NY. And chew on this: I love being a mush head. Never mind that it has taken me decades to understand the owl’s message, that I had to look backward before I could look forward. In the owl’s world, time is relative.
That owl I bought for a tube of lipstick and a handful of trinkets proved to be quite prescient. In indigenous traditions, owls are messengers between the living and the dead. In Harry Potter, the owls deliver the mail. In some esoteric traditions, they are symbolic of profound change. They are prevalent in UFO lore. When they are an individual’s totem animal, that person is probably living at levels for which there is no language. We’ve written about owls before. If you put owls into the search box, a lot more posts come up.
For Rob and me, that beautiful Amazonian owl was a message about transformation at the deepest levels. Within a year of that trip, we sold several books, became full-time writers, and were doing what we loved. A few years later, Megan was born, and our lives were transformed again.
I often think about that owl and hope that its haunting song continues somewhere in time. And yes, I’ve long since embraced being a mush head.
UPDATE
It just occurred to us that we’ve posted another synchro related to this same vessel about another one of our trips up the Amazon back in the day. You can find that story here.
You should take part in a contest for one of the best blogs on the web. I will recommend this site!
This is one of my favorite stories you’ve told!
Melissa! Good to “see” you! Thanks for coming by. Coming south any time soon?
I also met a man by the name of Louis de Bernieres who wrote a book called “Red Dog”
which has just this weekend been released in Australian cinemas.
It has had great reviews,too.
Here’s a link to a trailer,for all you dog lovers out there;
https://www.reddogmovie.com/
Louis also wrote “Captain Corelli’s Mandolin” which was made into a film starring Nic Cage,years ago.
I haven’t read any of Louis’s books but “Red Dog” looks like a good read,plus I’ve heard it is a little different to the movie.
Animals are reliable, many full of love, true in their affections, predictable in their actions, grateful and loyal. Difficult standards for people to live up to.
Alfred A. Montapert
Lovely quote!
Just checked out Mike Clelland’s blog, thanks for the link. Wow, he has a lot going on over there! Interesting stuff regarding the owls too. I think I would be a little unnerved if it continued for as long as he has had them around. Also, my owls haven’t all been live owls either, some yes and then the others as I mentioned above are just images of them. (To me that is strange since I didn’t or wasn’t really noticing them before – and the real owls aren’t very present in our surroundings either so to see several over the past few weeks was something to notice) I wonder though if your thoughts subconsciously seek that out, you know once you have had a few, oh my gosh look at that, type of moments. Anyway, it’s all very fascinating. I always thought of myself drawn to the lion (after all – I am a Leo) as well as a complete opposite animal here, the deer. Oddly enough people my whole life have made that connection too, numerous people have told me I remind them of a deer, it is the big Bambi eyes. LOL But I do hope the owl has picked me and that for awhile I see it just a little bit longer as it feels valuable.
Thanks Debra, hope you are doing better, rest up dear. Love the bait rescue! Buckets of good karma for you, LOL!
That is great Gypsy the wolf encounter! Getting a real caravan going are you? Best of luck.
Thanks Trish and Rob
let’s all join the gypsy caravan!
I only like mush heads. 🙂
SYNCHRO about the bugs, Debra! Yesterday our son was doing some yard work for a neighbor, and when he came in afterwards to shower, he walked through my room to the back door with a glass in his hand….a spider had nested in his hair while he was working in the yard! YUKK! We never kill insects, however, except mosquitoes, etc, and even though I’m arachnophobic, we re-locate spiders. Right now there is one that is enormous, about the size of a saucer, living in her web near our gazebo. She’s a FL banana spider, yellow and brownish-black, and they are HUGE! We’ve re-located her several times, but within a few hours she’s always back at her original site, so now we leave her alone. She has about a thousand tiny babies. The spiders eat mosquitoes and other outdoor biting insects, so we wouldn’t kill them even if we weren’t mush heads!! But I don’t go near her. Hubby would be able to collect my life insurance if I found one in MY hair! 🙂 Gyps, what a strange phenomenon! By any chance is the wolf your totem?? I know you’re a Lioness, but could still have a wolf as a familiar……
I remember those huge suckers from when I lived in vero beach. Total grossness, running into one of those webs at night!
oh, geeeeee…….i forgot to mention that the grey wolf travel trailer that was listed for sale in google is in the town i live in! out of all the sites on the net, this grey wolf travel trailer is right here in this town!
And the fact that it’s in the town where you live…. don’t think it gets any clearer than that.
thank you – yes, it isn’t rocket science here, is it! 😉
dear mush head – what a riveting story! i especially love that it was a tube of lipstick used for barter – you know of some of my own owl stories – the one who came the night i received word of my brother’s death – and who [or another of his owl family] came with me when i moved to another residence – the weird thing for me today has not to do with an owl but bears telling in light of this post – while i was out with the little ones earlier, just as we approached the turn off the main highway to our house, a large gray wolf crossed the road – the 4lane divided highway that goes north/south through the entire state – right in the middle of the heaviest populated area of our town – a grey wolf – traffic was braking and nearly rear-ending for at least 1/2 mile upon sight of him/her – several cars pulled over – i was northbound and the wolf was in the middle of the southbound lanes of traffic – but not one person failed to slow down or actually to stop for him – i mean, there were near-collisions with every blink of the eye – anyway, i so wanted to turn around and go back to where he was but for one thing i couldn’t have gotten through the backlog of cars once i turned around – finally i saw a patrol car pull out toward where he was – so aside from the absolute and total uniqueness of such a thing – a grey wolf in this po-dunk delaware town on a major highway – is that for some time i have – as you know – toyed with the idea of buying a little camper – well, when i googled “grey wolf delaware” the second site that popped up was one selling a “grey wolf”travel trailer – now, the other thing is that last night, i had this extremely intense dream – i mean intense – i was there kind of dream – from which each time i woke, i went back to in order to continue the dream – of an old friend i’ve not seen in many many years – there are several chapters/layers to our story which i won’t go into here but which i believe have some kind of bearing on today – in any event, all day long, i’ve been on the verge of calling him – to see if he is ok – the dream was just so intense – in the dream, we were the way we used to be – but the after-dream intensity has remained so that it is distracting – now, whether the grey wolf came in response to my wondering of the travel trailer or in response to my dream of my friend bob i do not know – i feel more that it was to do with bob but i’ve no clue how it might be connected – it ‘s just such a non-coincidence that it happened and then that i come here now to find this particular post today –
s/another mush head
and cj – what a heartbreaking story – bringing tears to my eyes literally – but i too know that matt somehow understands and is there under the rainbow wagging his tail toward you and sunshine –
Uh, gypsy, this strikes me as a direct synchro confirmation to buy that grey wolf camper. What a terrific animal messenger story!
Thank you all for your kind expressions of comfort. In my heart I know that Matt understands….now….that I had no choice other than to hit him. But never in my life have I ever intentionally hurt any animal, and was devastated by that look of agony in his eyes. As a medium I’ve had many visitations from the animal companions of clients, and have even been visited on occasion by my own who have passed, especially a lovebird named Echo. So whenever my mind envisions that look on Matt’s face, I try to quickly imagine him running and playing joyfully in a field of flowers, with lots of other animal friends joining him. We can learn so much from them, I believe, because our species hasn’t yet achieved the level of unconditional love that they have achieved. I often wonder which species is actually the most highly evolved.
cj,
my heart broke for poor Matt.
I am sure he’s in the Summerland.
What a difficult spot you were put in. 🙁
Never heard the expression before but another mush head here! Brilliant post. Just love these stories that involve your travels.
I’d never heard the expression before either, at least not used as this guy used it. I figure most of here are mush heads!
Trish/Rob: I checked out your link above from one of your previous posts regarding the owl. I am truly sorry about your mother. That was a very strange linking between the two.
So now what…oh dear God I don’t want to die! Here I was feeling good about the appearance to the owls. I still do. I feel a great energy about the whole thing to tell you the truth. And Mike Clelland. This is very interesting. This is the second time hearing his name connected with owls. Jen mentioned him. Does he have a blog too? Yes, please share the story, I am very interested in what it could all mean, if anything. I bought a book about animal spirits. But haven’t read too much of it yet. What is an omen, do you pick a totem animal or does it pick you? Very interested in knowing anyone’s thoughts.
Cole – for you, these owl sightings appear to be quite positive. I think the owl picked you.
Cole – here’s the link to mike’s blog -https://hiddenexperience.blogspot.com/
Cole, I haven’t had a chance to catch up, but I have had many encounters with owls. Always, it was a portent of a big change: such as meeting a spiritual teacher, moving after living in the same home for 11 years or a new psychic experience.
Recently, an owl moved into the tree that over hangs my front patio.
Owls are connected to very powerful goddess figures (such as Lilith & Athena), which is part of why they are feared.
Trish, I am so glad you turned out to be a mush head! I am too.
Lama Gyatso always said all beings are sentient: they all want happiness and to avoid pain.
Rescuing animals (and bugs) is a way to accumulate positive energy. One of our regular practices included going to an LA marina and buying live bait, setting it free.
Love the idea of that – buying live bait and releasing it. I may use that in a book, Debra!
I think I would like Lama Gyatso!
He was (is) a truly luminous being. He wish he that didn’t have to leave Earth so soon.
I attended a talk on Saturday morning at the “Byron Bay Writer’s Festival” called
“Animals as Healers and Totems in Literature”.
There was guy named Scott Alexander-King and he has A book called “Animal Dreaming” plus some cards and CD’s with the the same theme running through them.
I bought a copy off him and had a chat to him, but I haven’t read it yet.Looks good though (and he is definitely a “mush head”.-)
Here’s a link to his website;
https://www.animaldreaming.com/book.php
There was also two wonderful ladies,Kim Falconer who writes animal fantasy books,and a lady named Helen Brown who has a book on the New York Times bestsellers list called “Cleo”(I’ve got a copy of that,and it looks heart-breakingly wonderful).
It’s being made into a major motion picture in the States,she tells me (I can’t wait to see it).
And Barry Eaton,the radio announcer and author of “Afterlife”was the MC.
I’ll be blogging about that talk later and putting up photos of these guys,as well.
P.S. I thought a “Mush Head” would be someone who likes to trip on mushrooms ?
Another book for my buy list. I now have so many books on my shelves to read and so many more that I want to buy and read that I need at last 3 lifetimes.
I know what you are saying only too well…but I just can’t stop buying them…but they seem to jump out at me when it’s their time to be read…oddly enough.
Timing is everything…or as my new Fin Mc Missle toy says
“Time is of the essence”.-)
Yep, I’m a mush head too and are even teased by “animal people” and farmers as being too soft. 😀
Math – Matt holds you no ill will, that’s the beauty of animals. They have feelings as strong and powerful as humans but aggression is part of their nature not their essence.
Too soft!?! Never.
Wow Trish, what an adventurous life you and Rob lived and do live. I remember reading about your “before Megan life” in your book 7 Secrets of Synchronicity and thought, can you imagine just picking up and going to live in the Amazon! Fantastic. As for the N.Y. guy some people just don’t see the big picture, which you know. Small and closed minded unable to see how all living things are interconnected. Animals teach us so much about ourselves and are amazing beings, which like everyone else here agrees, are capable of giving and feeling love and compassion whether they know what that is or not, they thrive from the nurturing energy. I am very glad that you stop in the middle of the road for turtles. I am very glad that you reached out to the owl. In a way I think all those actions bless your life just a little bit more, as well as that of the animals.
I don’t know if you checked out Nancy’s place, but I did write a post regarding some very strange experiences that I have been having as of late that have to do with owls. I thought of you and the timing of these synchronistic encounters. I have had many owl appearances within only 2 months and it has forced me to read up on them as much as I can and to look a little closer as to how it can relate to what I am experiencing in my life. I am thrilled by their appearances, I feel as if I am being watched over by something good. After writing my post I’ve continued to see over the course of several days 2 more owls, one on a greeting card as I stood in front of the rack, it jumped right out at me. And the other as I stopped at a red light waiting for it to turn green, I glanced over and there next to the door of a small boutique was a large owl carved out of wood, guarding the entrance to the shop. Your post is yet another occurrence related to an owl. Very cool. I will be sure to check out your links above.
Great post and keep loving those animals, it is whoooo you are!
Mathaddict, so sorry to hear about Sunshine, glad she is recovering from that experience. And very sorry to hear about Matt. It was only because he was in pain. And when an animal is in pain they do rely on those that love them to do the right thing and help them. You love your animals too and had to do what you did. Do not feel sad about the moment of his expression, although I know it is hard, but rather recall the closeness and affection you gave him near the end, for I am sure this is the energy he felt from you and took with him. Take care.
Cole – I’ll check out the owl postings! I know Mike Clelland over at Hidden Experience will be most interested in your owl stories!
Yes, I too am a mush head. I don’t trust anyone who isn’t. People who believe that animals don’t have feelings, most likely don’t have any feelings themselves. Or are just plain stupid. Yes, mush heads unite!
It’s one way to know immediately if youwant to spend your time with someone!
I think being a “mush head” is probably one of the greatest things a person can be!
Right now I’m going through an experience of deep grief that I can’t shake, and I keep hoping that the spirit of the animal involved will somehow contact me and let me know I’m forgiven….that I did what I had to do. That I had no choice. A few months ago when our son came to live with us for awhile, following his divorce, he brought his Great Dane, Matt. IN GA we owned a small AKC Great Dane kennel so are very familiar with that giant breed, and love them. I of course have Sunshine, my yellow lab/rhodesian ridgeback, who is ill. Matt and Sunshine lived together comfortably in the house, aloof from each other but accepting of each other’s presence and completely non-confrontational.
One night a few weeks ago I was here alone and had just taken Matt outside, and when he and I walked back inside the front door, he suddenly very viciously attacked Sunshine, grabbing her around her neck like a Pit Bull with his massive jaws and throwing her to the floor, and the battle that ensued was terrifying. The bottom line here is that I had to grab my tall walking stick and hit Matt with huge force on his hindquarters to get him away from Sunshine. He let her go and immediately went into a powerful seizure. I managed to somehow get him into our son’s bedroom. But I am haunted by the expression on his face as he turned and looked at me. It was the most pitiful, hurt, pained expresssion I’ve ever seen on any animal. His eyes were filled with agony when he looked into mine.
The next day he had to be euthanized, because it turned out that he had a brain tumor and was dying, and the cancer caused his attack on Sunshine. (She was wounded and traumatized but was treated and is OK now.) I continue to see Matt’s expression in my mind all the time, and can’t seem to make it go away. Hitting him was neccesary. He would have killed Sunshine. But the expression he gave me after the seizure was HUMAN. He was trying to talk to me, to tell me he was in pain and that I had hurt him. That’s my final memory of Matt. I couldn’t watch them take him away, altho I had hugged and kissed him goodbye while sobbing because I’d had to hit him. Anyone who believes animals can’t think are heartless and cruel and don’t know what they’re talking about. I’m the queen of mush heads, and I KNOW animals have souls and that they think and give us unconditional love. Hooray for the freedom of the owl, Trish!! We mush heads are blessed. I keep hoping Matt will come to me and let me know he’s well now and happily romping on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge.
This is so sad, math. You did what you had to do. I’m sure Matt will be stopping by.
I wouldn’t beat yourself up too much over this CJ.
I think back to when I was a kid and did something I should not have done,and my parents belted me for it.I’m sure I gave them that same bewildered look too.But I got over it and looking at it later on,I can see that I probably deserved it (not that I’m giving people a green light to belt your kids).
I’m sure the dog understands what it was all about now.
Don’t lose sleep over it.I’ve had to belt my dog too,when it attacks the other dog in a fit of rage,but it’s soon forgotten,and we are then best friends again,until the next time it happens that is .-)
Beautiful story, Trish. I love that you are a mush head. We have that in common.
Mush heads, unite!