
Now that we’ve got two dogs, we try to get to the dog park regularly – like every day. When that’s not possible – weather, other commitments – we take Nika and Noah down to the dog park in our neighborhood. They have the place to themselves, enjoy sniffing around and battling over the Frisbee, but we can tell it’s just not the same experience as the real dog park.
During our visit to the dog park the other day, we see this very weird German shepherd prowling the fence as we approach the gate. There’s something wrong with this dog, Rosie. We’ve seen her before, and we suspect her owner is a diehard, extremist Republican and that she may be the canine version!
As soon as Nika steps inside the gate, Rosie is all over her, a hundred plus pounds versus 42 pounds. But Nika, who is just ten months old and used to playing with Noah – a BIG Golden Retriever, 100 pounds of muscle – defends herself valiantly. Yet, she invariably ends up on her back, whimpering.
So the other day, Rosie is making Nika’s life miserable and Trish is trying to snap the leash on her so we can take her to another part of the park, and Rob is pushing Rosie away from our dog. Rosie’s owner comes rushing over, shouting, “Hey, hey, stop pushing my dog. She doesn’t have a mean or hostile bone in her body!”
“Then get her away from our dog!” Rob snaps.
“They’re just playing.”
Uh, no, beg to differ. Rosie is attacking Nika. There’s a difference between dogs who are playing and dogs who are seriously attacking. The difference lies in body language, bared teeth. Rush Limbaugh is like Rosie. Oh, I’m just an entertainer, I don’t mean to defile or damage anyone.
So Rob gets Rosie off of Nika, and we head toward another part of the park. But en route, Rosie’s human makes a big mistake – he grabs Rob’s shoulder. Rob, who is so physically fit and flexible from the gym and yoga that he puts everyone else to shame, pushes Rose’s human away from him. And wow, then profanities fly. “What the f**!! is wrong with you, man? I’ve been nothing but courteous to you, you can’t come in here and push my dog around and then shove me.”
Really? You pushed Rob first, guy.Then I’m thinking, Uh-oh. This guy is asking for trouble. Rob is the most non-violent person I’ve ever known – until the other person makes a move first. Then all bets are off.
Meanwhile, I’m just trying to get Nika and Noah into another part of the dog park, where there’s a fence between us and this weirdo. We finally get into the smaller park and Rosie, oddball dog that she is, races along the fence, still trying to get at Nika. Rosie tries to dig a hole under the fence. She drools, salivates, barks, moans. She’s like Limbaugh going on for days about whatever his current pet peeve is, twisting facts to fit his agenda.
After that, we skipped a few days at the park and today went over there early, before Limbaugh and Rosie had arrived. Our friend Karin was there with Cody, a husky and Noah’s best friend last summer. I told her the story about Rosie and Limbaugh. She just shook her head.
“Sometimes, it’s like high school here. Cliques, politics, and bullshit.” She gazed wistfully at the larger park that has been closed since late January so that the city can build a pavilion large enough to accommodate humans when it rains, or it’s windy or cold or scorching hot. “They need to open the larger part of the dog park. We get on each other’s nerves here.”
Yes, we do. Liberals and conservatives rarely mix well. Their pets tend to reflect that. Rosie, I’m sorry to report, is a conservative extremist who feels she absolutely must overpower every smaller dog in the park while her human shouts, There’s not a hostile bone in her body! Nika, I’m happy to report, is a joyful liberal who will defend herself when she must but is happiest just doing her thing –greeting everyone with licks and a wiggling whisper, Hey, dude, you on my side?
The dogs know. They get it. Dog park politics is human politics on a smaller, more intimate scale.
